CHRISTIAN CONDUCT IN A FRUSTRATING WORLD – 1 Peter 3:8-12

Preached August 14, 2011
from
1 Peter 3:8-12

Theme: We are to prove ourselves to be God’s people in this world by how we respond to the frustrating challenges around us.

(Unless otherwise noted, all Scripture references are taken from The Holy Bible, New King James Version; copyright 1982, Thomas Nelson, Inc.)

Sometimes, in my personal reading of the Scriptures, I run across a passage that keeps on lingering in my mind. Whenever that happens, I prayerfully consider whether or not it’s something the Lord wants me to preach from.

Such has been the case with this morning’s passage. In 1 Peter 3, the apostle Peter wrote;

Finally, all of you be of one mind, having compassion for one another; love as brothers, be tenderhearted, be courteous; not returning evil for evil or reviling for reviling, but on the contrary blessing, knowing that you were called to this, that you may inherit a blessing. For

“He who would love life
And see good days,
Let him refrain his tongue from evil,
And his lips from speaking deceit.
Let him turn away from evil and do good;
Let him seek peace and pursue it.
For the eyes of the LORD are on the righteous,
And His ears are open to their prayers;
But the face of the LORD is against those who do evil” (1 Peter 3:8-12).

* * * * * * * * * *

It might help you appreciate why this passage has stood out to me, if I tell you a little about where I was the other day when I read it.

I try to have a daily time in the Bible the first thing in the morning. And I usually read it while sitting in a cozy recliner in the parsonage living room—right next to a big picture window. I love to read next to that window; because every once in a while, I catch myself staring at the beautiful view outside. I might see the clouds rolling by in the sky. Or I might see the blue sky and the sunrise peeking through the leaves of the apple tree just outside. I enjoy gazing out at the tall trees off at a distance, and seeing the colors of the leaves as the seasons change. I enjoy watching birds fly by. It’s a very entertaining window!

But that big window is significant to me for another reason. To me, it has become a symbol of deep emotion. I hate to have to admit this to you; but sometimes—when I feel extremely perturbed or frustrated or angry over something that someone said or did; or when I’m pacing across the living room floor while talking on the phone to someone whose really testing me in some way; or when I’m going through some kind of trial that is trying my patience to the breaking point—I imagine what it would be like to just take off a shoe and throw it through that window. (If you’ve ever heard me say, “Wouldn’t you just like to throw a shoe through a window right now?”—well, now you know. I’m usually thinking of that window when I say it. )

Now, I’m pretty sure I would ever actually do a thing like that. I certainly pray I never would, anyway. (Besides; when I’m pacing in the living room, I’m usually wearing a pair of slippers; and throwing them wouldn’t make much of an impact. ) But let’s suppose for a moment that I did do something like that. Let’s suppose that, at a time of deep anger or frustration, I actually lost control, took a shoe off and sent it flying right through the middle of that big picture window. Imagine what a noise it would make! Imagine all the millions of pieces of glass shattering and showering and glimmering on to the deck outside! Oh—wouldn’t that be momentarily satisfying!

But what would happen afterward? Would I find that my problem was solved? Would I find that my frustrating circumstance had changed? Not in the least. In fact, it would create a whole new set of problems. For one thing, I would have to go hopping outside on one foot to find my shoe. Then, I would have to spend some time cleaning up all the broken glass. After that, I’d have to arrange for someone to come and replace the window—which, by the way, wouldn’t be cheap! And since it’s the parsonage of the church, I’d have to report the damage to the building manager—which would really take some explaining!

But there’d be another kind of damage that would be done—involving some things that wouldn’t be so easy to fix. There would be the damage done to the peace of our home. There would be a new sense of apprehension and fear that my action would create in the heart of my wife; because she’d never be sure if I might not go out of control do something like that again—or something even worse. There would be a new fear in me as well; because if I would do such a thing as that just once, I would have crossed a line that I might cross again in the future. There would be the damage done to my reputation as a man of God. Perhaps someone passing by would see the shoe flying through the window; and it would bring dishonor to our home and to our church family. And there would be a dirty feeling left in my inner being; and a sense of regret and shame that I might never entirely be able to overcome.

Now; the pop-psychologists of the world today would say, “Throw the shoe! It’s not healthy for you to hold it in! Express your anger! Let it out!” But praise God, I have a choice! And even if I may feel like throwing my shoe through the window at times, I don’t have to. Instead, I can turn to God and ask Him to help me process my frustration or anger in a godly way, and invite the Holy Spirit to change my heart and my attitude. And when I do, He does.

Now; just so you’ll know, the window is still intact. I was sitting next to it just the other day. But while I was sitting next there and reading this passage, it set me to thinking about other ways that ways that we might, as it were, send a shoe through a picture window.

At home or at work or in our everyday interactions with the people of this world, in moments of great frustration or anger, we might give way to our sinful passions, open our mouths, and blurt out something designed to pay someone else back or put them in their place. We might say something very hurtful and vengeful and nasty that breaks through and shatters someone else’s spirit. Or we might do something wrongful in order to pay someone back for some injustice they may have done to us—something that, we think, will “make things even”. And for a brief moment, it may even make us feel good to have done so. After all, we reason, they had it coming. But once we’ve let those words out of our mouth, or taken vengeance in our own hand, we’ve done some long-term damage that is never easy to fix. We’ve crossed a line. We’ve destroyed peace. We’ve created ill-will. We’ve acted dishonorably. We’ve made those who are close to us a little more apprehensive of us. We’ve done something that will increasingly make us feel dirty inside. As Christians, we’ve disobeyed God and dishonored our Lord. And we’ve given the unsaved people in our lives a reason to question the sincerity of our faith and to doubt the reality of our Savior.

And all of this helped me to appreciate just how valuable a thing it is that this morning’s passage is calling us to do.

* * * * * * * * * *

When Peter wrote these words, he addressed them to Jewish Christians who were suffering severe persecution for their faith. They were being called upon to suffer for their allegiance to Jesus Christ, and to bear witness to Him in a very hostile environment. How they responded to the frustrations and trials and injustices they experienced was vital to the spread of the gospel.

Just take a look at 1 Peter 2:11-12. That’s were we find the roots of this morning’s passage. There, Peter wrote;

Beloved, I beg you as sojourners and pilgrims, abstain from fleshly lusts which war against the soul, having your conduct honorable among the Gentiles, that when they speak against you as evildoers, they may, by your good works which they observe, glorify God in the day of visitation (1 Peter 2:11-12).

He then goes on to explain what that ‘honorable conduct’ should look like in particular situations. In verses 13-17, he explains what it would look like in our behavior as citizens of an earthly government. In verses 18-25, he explains what it would look like on the job—in a master/servant kind of relationship. In 3:1-6, he explains what it would look like in a wife’s relationship toward her husband; and in verse 7, in a husband’s relationship with his wife. In all of these relationships—knowing that an unbelieving world is watching—we’re to have our “conduct honorable”.

And that brings us to this morning’s passage—a crowning description of Christian conduct before a watching world. He begins by saying, “Finally, all of you . . . ” And here, if I may put it this way, Peter exhorts all of us not to throw our shoe through the window! He teaches us that we are to prove ourselves to be God’s people in this world by how we respond to the frustrating challenges around us.

* * * * * * * * * * *

Let’s first consider . . .

1. THE CONDUCT WE ARE TO EXHIBIT (vv. 8-9a).

Peter writes; “Finally, all of you be of one mind, having compassion for one another; love as brothers, be tenderhearted, be courteous . . . ” (v. 8). And even though much of what he has to say would be applicable to all relationships that we might find ourselves in, I believe he is thinking primarily of our relationships with one another as fellow Christians.

We all know that unbelieving people are scrutinizing us carefully and looking at how we treat them. But I wonder if you have ever thought about how the unbelieving world is also scrutinizing how we, as Christians, treat each other! When we claim to be followers together of Jesus Christ, and members together of one body; and yet, they see us fighting with one another and being impatient with each other, or bad-mouthing our fellow Christians behind their backs, or being rude and unjust to one another in the household of God, then they certainly won’t think much of our Savior. But even Jesus Himself said, “By this all will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another” (John 13:35). I wonder if we don’t have things out of balance today. We spend a lot of time trying to persuade unbelieving people that we love them; but we don’t give enough attention to the one thing that Jesus said would most convince them of the reality of our faith—the way we treat one another.

How are we to treat one another? Peter says first of all that we are to “be of one mind”. And I don’t think this just means that we are to be in doctrinal agreement with one another and all believe alike. I’m sure it means that; but I suggest that it means much more than that. I believe it means that we are to have one basic “mind-set”—one “attitude of heart” that we have in common. And that “mind-set” is not to be our own, but the “mind-set” of Another!

Back in Romans 15:5, the apostle Paul wrote these words of blessing to the believers in Rome: “Now may the God of patience and comfort grant you to be like-minded toward one another . . . ” And then, he explained the example we’re to follow for that like-mindedness; “. . . according to Christ Jesus”. In Philippians 2:1-4, he wrote;

Therefore if there is any consolation in Christ, if any comfort of love, if any fellowship of the Spirit, if any affection and mercy, fulfill my joy by being like-minded, having the same love, being of one accord, of one mind. Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself. Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others (Philippians 2:1-4).

And then, look at what he says in verse 5; “Let this mind be in you which was also in Christ Jesus . . . ”

Dear brother or sister in Christ; if I let my own mind-set dominate my life, and you let your own mind-set dominate your life, it might be that we will occasionally—accidentally—agree with one another. But more than likely, we will be characterized by a constant state of friction with one another. And why would the people of the world be interested in that? They have enough troubles of their own! But if I let the mind-set of our Lord and Master Jesus Christ dominate me, and you let His mind-set dominate you, then we’re in perfect harmony with each other; because we’re of the same mind “according to Christ Jesus”. We’re all behaving like our Master! May God help each of us to so humble ourselves as to allow His Holy Spirit in us to dominate each of our lives with the mind of Christ! Then, we truly will be “of one mind.”

Now; the mind of Jesus was such that He humbled Himself—even to the point of the cross—in order to serve our needs and save our souls. And so, Peter goes on to describe what that “one-mindedness” toward one another would look like in actual practice. In the original language of Peter’s letter, each of these is a single adverb that modifies the idea of what it means to be “of one mind”.

First, he says that we will be “having compassion for one another”. The Greek word that this come from is the one from which we get the word “sympathy”. We will, as it were, be sensitive to the feelings and frustrations of one another, and will be moved with compassion regarding them. We will be just like our Lord Jesus; who is not a High Priest “who cannot sympathize with our weaknesses, but was in all points tempted as we are, yet without sin” (Hebrews 4:14).

Second, he says that we will “love as brothers”. In the church, it will be more than merely the fact that we are one another’s best friends; but that we are genuinely “family”. We are to love each other as people that are forever connected to one another in our divine elder Brother, Christ. We are to love each other just like the Lord Jesus has loved us—declaring to us that His Father is now our Father, and His God is now our God (John 20:17); and that He now shares with us all that the Father has given Him (John 17:22).

Third, he says that we will be “tenderhearted”. And I take this to be something different from the compassion we’re to show one another. I take it to be a description of how we are to be in ourselves when others in the family approach us. We’re not to be heard-hearted toward one another, or closed-up to one another whenever there’s a problem in the relationship. We’re to be open, and vulnerable, and receptive toward one another—easy to be approached; willing to be corrected; eager to forgive one another’s faults and to ask forgiveness for our own.

And finally, Peter says that we’re to be “courteous”; or as some translations have it, “humble”. We’re not to think of ourselves as better than each other; and thus not look down on each other, or despise each other, or be rude to each other. We’re to treat each other with genuine esteem and respect—as those who, like us, are also deeply loved by Jesus. We’re to—from the heart—honor one another by the simple courtesies of saying “may I” and “please” and “thank you”.

Now think of it, dear brothers and sisters in Christ; if we are truly “of one mind” with one another—in such a way as to be compassionate for one another, loving one another as brethren, tenderhearted toward one another, and sincerely courteous to one another—we will never figuratively take off our shoe in anger and frustration toward one another and through it through each other’s picture window. We will not say or do the kind of things to one another that deliberately break each other’s spirit or shatter each other’s soul. We won’t do that in our church, nor will we do it to our homes toward our fellow Christians who also happen to be our children or our spouses.

And just think of what that communicates, to the watching world, of the reality of our Savior!

* * * * * * * * * * *

Now; to some degree, some of those things also apply to our treatment to the unsaved people we encounter in this world. But it’s important to remember that Peter isn’t speaking to Christians who are in a nice, peaceful environment. He’s writing to Christians who are being persecuted for their faith. And so, I believe Peter then goes on in verse nine to speak specifically of our relationships with those in the world who oppose us and treat us unjustly.

In this world, as followers of Jesus, we’re going to be hated. Didn’t Jesus tell us so? He said, “If you were of the world, the world would love its own. Yet because you are not of the world, but I chose you out of the world, therefore the world hates you” (John 15:19). He said, “If they persecuted Me, they will also persecute you” (v. 20). But just as the way that we treat each other within the body of Christ is vital to the spread of the gospel, so also is how we react to those who treat us unjustly from the outside.

And so, Peter says in verse nine, “not returning evil for evil or reviling for reviling . . . ” In other words, no matter how tempted we may be to take off the shoe and throw it through the window—no matter how tempted we may be in the flesh to do something or say something in return that will hurt that other person back, or put them in their place—we are not to do it.

And this is to simply follow the pattern set for us by our Lord. Back in 2:21-24, Peter said that

. . . Christ also suffered for us, leaving us an example, that you should follow His steps:

“Who committed no sin,
Nor was deceit found in His mouth”;

who, when He was reviled, did not revile in return; when He suffered, He did not threaten, but committed Himself to Him who judges righteously; who Himself bore our sins in His own body on the tree, that we, having died to sins, might live for righteousness—by whose stripes you were healed (1 Peter 2:21-24).

Not only are we to have the mind of Christ toward one another, but we’re also to have His mind toward those who do evil toward us. In fact, we’re to have His mind to the degree that—far from throwing that shoe through the window—we even bless those who revile us and do us evil. As Peter says, “not returning evil for evil or reviling for reviling, but on the contrary blessing, knowing that you were called to this” (v. 9a).

The “this” to which we’re called is the example of our Lord’s patient suffering that we’re to follow. In 2:20-21, Peter wrote,

For what credit is it if, when you are beaten for your faults, you take it patiently? But when you do good and suffer, if you take it patiently, this is commendable before God. For to this you were called, because Christ also suffered for us, leaving us an example, that you should follow His steps . . . (1 Peter 2:20-21).

* * * * * * * * * *

Now; this is hard to do—especially when you feel much more like throwing a shoe through the window instead! But look at how Peter then goes on to give us . . .

2. THE THEOLOGICAL BASIS FOR THE CONDUCT (vv. 9b-12).

He says that we’re to do be careful to respond to the frustrating challenges around us with Christlike character, “that you may inherit a blessing. ”

When I think of this, I think back to what Peter said at the beginning of his letter. In the first chapter, in verses 3-9, Peter says;

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who according to His abundant mercy has begotten us again to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, to an inheritance incorruptible and undefiled and that does not fade away, reserved in heaven for you, who are kept by the power of God through faith for salvation ready to be revealed in the last time. In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while, if need be, you have been grieved by various trials, that the genuineness of your faith, being much more precious than gold that perishes, though it is tested by fire, may be found to praise, honor, and glory at the revelation of Jesus Christ, whom having not seen you love. Though now you do not see Him, yet believing, you rejoice with joy inexpressible and full of glory, receiving the end of your faith—the salvation of your souls (1 Peter 1:3-9).

This great and glorious inheritance is the salvation of our souls. But in our passage this morning, Peter isn’t saying that we “earn” this glorious inheritance through our Christlike conduct. Rather, he’s saying that, because of God’s call on our lives, we already have this glorious inheritance; and that because it’s ours, we ought therefore to behave in a way that’s consistent with it.

Peter goes on to quote from the Old Testament—from a portion of Psalm 34; and says, “For ‘He who would love life and see good days, let him refrain his tongue from evil, and his lips from speaking deceit. Let him turn away from evil and do good; let him seek peace and pursue it. For the eyes of the LORD are on the righteous, and His ears are open to their prayers; but the face of the LORD is against those who do evil’” (1 Peter 3:10-12).

In other words: in the heat of the moment, when we are angry and frustrated and perturbed, we’re not to give way to our sinful passions—like the people of this world do. We’re to remember that the Lord blesses those who do good, but opposes those who do evil. We’re therefore not to blurt out the kind of words that do harm to others. We’re not to threaten to pay back evil for evil. We’re not to return reviling for reviling. We’re not, as it were, to take off our shoe and throw it through the picture window—perhaps gratifying our fleshly passions for a moment, but at the cost of doing damage to someone else’s spirit.

On the contrary, we’re to return with a blessing—just like our Lord commanded us to

love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who spitefully use you and persecute you, that you may be sons of your Father in heaven; for He makes His sun rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the just and on the unjust. For if you love those who love you, what reward have you? Do not even the tax collectors do the same? And if you greet your brethren only, what do you do more than others? Do not even the tax collectors do so? Therefore you shall be perfect, just as your Father in heaven is perfect (Matthew 5:44-48).